Denbeigh Whitmarsh
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Denbeigh Whitmarsh's work serves as a cultural milieu between the rural and the urban.
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Mr. Rundle stalks me.
Sunlight is burning holes through
The black field trees
Bringing your memory back to me
Swirling cyan-evergreen-gold-purple paint
Or Amber dripping viscous from my bed
Running alone, it isn’t even close
To home
The sun dying, crop-fields rising.
Still striking full sole on these filthy roads
Going nowhere
And coming back.
Memories of thrush-filled creeks
Throwing rocks at wishes
And pennies at the brick wall
That kept us shut.
Already knowing how we’d fall
Laying lies upon the grass
And stumbling over dropped branches
You couldn’t keep up
And I knew you weren’t for keeps
My brother caught you
In his steel-toed work boots
You were looking back through the boughs
And I ran away from the scene
And all this time I thought it was love
Who ran away from me.
And now I’m lying here with John
He isn’t Deare,
He isn’t green, and
He’s buried six feet under to my left.
His corpse is long since rotted through,
And coyotes scrounged the horse’s flesh
Look what happens when you
Leave me to my head.
Sometimes I wonder why mother
Gave us guts of lead.
Pushed us past the fence.
She knew I’d fall, again
And again
And then come back
And all this time I thought it was love
Look what happens when you leave me
With John,
The dirt,
And mother in
My head.
Hemlock.
Lying in bed, all alone
And the sound of the fridge hits head hard.
The starchy blankets catch on dry skin,
The little chunks of dirt beneath the belly,
Deposited on the mattress by your feet.
Do I ever sleep?
Sirens of an ambulance croon,
I hear the neighbours cackle.
I wonder where the coyotes are,
And him, home.
Where flew the desperate late-night bellows,
Dame Holstein’s hemmed-in labour?
Wish I could hear the shallow creak
Of my sister’s hemlock bed-frame as she turns,
Or hear my blonde-haired brother cry out in his dreams,
The jingle of the dog collar as he collapses on the floor, spent.
But once again I only hear the silence and the city-sirens’ screams.
Denbeigh is a young woman from rural Canada who grew up in the woods and then experienced immense culture shock coming to Montreal. Much of her poetry tries to decipher the tangle of roots she still has connected to nature and her halcyon childhood. She also grapples with the paradox of exile, as she tries to reconcile the comfort of life in a small town with the damaging aspects of her redneck culture, and with the hypocrisy of the big city.
Mr. Rundle stalks me.Sunlight is burning holes throughThe black field treesBringing your memory back to me Swirling cyan-evergreen-gold-purple paint Or Amber dripping viscous from my bedRunning alone, it isn’t even closeTo homeThe sun dying, crop-fields rising.Still striking full sole on these filthy roads Going nowhere And coming back. Memories of thrush-filled creeks Throwing rocks at wishes And pennies at the brick wallThat kept us shut. Already knowing how we’d fall Laying lies upon the grassAnd stumbling over dropped branches You couldn’t keep up And I knew you weren’t for keeps My brother caught you In his steel-toed work bootsYou were looking back through the boughs And I ran away from the scene And all this time I thought it was loveWho ran away from me. And now I’m lying here with John He isn’t Deare, He isn’t green, and He’s buried six feet under to my left.His corpse is long since rotted through,And coyotes scrounged the horse’s flesh Look what happens when you Leave me to my head. Sometimes I wonder why motherGave us guts of lead. Pushed us past the fence. She knew I’d fall, againAnd againAnd then come backAnd all this time I thought it was love Look what happens when you leave meWith John, The dirt, And mother inMy head. Hemlock.Lying in bed, all aloneAnd the sound of the fridge hits head hard. The starchy blankets catch on dry skin,The little chunks of dirt beneath the belly, Deposited on the mattress by your feet. Do I ever sleep? Sirens of an ambulance croon,I hear the neighbours cackle.I wonder where the coyotes are,And him, home. Where flew the desperate late-night bellows,Dame Holstein’s hemmed-in labour?Wish I could hear the shallow creak Of my sister’s hemlock bed-frame as she turns, Or hear my blonde-haired brother cry out in his dreams,The jingle of the dog collar as he collapses on the floor, spent. But once again I only hear the silence and the city-sirens’ screams.